Main Edition
US
FR
→ Vatican to hold press conference on aliens
Catholicism is a broad church, and it appears the Vatican is now embracing lifeforms from beyond Earth. A notice uploaded to the Holy See’s website announces that cardinals will tomorrow hold a press conference discussing how to discern between “apparitions and other supernatural phenomena”.
Pope to hold press conference on aliens and the supernatural tomorrow! 👽👹🇻🇦 pic.twitter.com/ttojMM4k0N
— Sky Fire News! (@SkyFireNews) May 16, 2024
What would Pope Francis think? Well, one of the speakers in Friday’s alien powwow is Cardinal Victor Manuel Fernández, a close associate of the Pontifex. This will be the first time the Vatican has held an official event discussing extraterrestrial affairs since 1978, and attendees are set to hear how the Catholic Church is planning for future supernatural encounters. Perhaps we shouldn’t be surprised, though. A full decade ago, the Pope generously said that he’d baptise Martians if they asked, clarifying that he meant “green men, with a long nose and big ears, like children draw”. In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Galactic Spirit?
→ Campus censorship machine comes back to bite progressives
Fancy that. Columbia University’s speech restrictions, which were ramped up after 2020 in the name of diversity, equity and inclusion, are now being used to silence Left-wing protesters.
Efforts to quash “hateful” and “far-Right” speech have bewilderingly led to crackdowns on “ideas that are not inherently hateful” — including the “from the river to the sea” chant — according to a new Vox piece which urges progressives to reclaim the value of free speech. “Protecting radical dissent requires tolerating Right-wing speech,” the author begrudgingly acknowledges.
In years past, Vox has repeatedly scoffed at the idea that the free speech rights of conservatives are under attack on campus, a popular argument during the Trump years. But as the Left falls victim to campus censorship, the issue is now suddenly all too real. Maybe free speech has a future after all.
→ Who dropped their cocaine on Capitol Hill?
In a story that should normally rank alongside bears defecating in the woods, a bag of cocaine has been found around the Capitol in Washington DC.
BREAKING: Cocaine has been found in the Capitol. pic.twitter.com/b5SAaPEjMD
— Jesse Watters (@JesseBWatters) May 16, 2024
Yet the media has leapt on the incident, with Fox News airing a breaking news alert which breathlessly announced the development. It was left to programme anchor Jesse Waters to quickly clarify that the drugs had been found at the Capitol police headquarters — which are several blocks away from the Capitol building. Of course, this didn’t stop him from alluding to Hunter Biden’s recent visit to Congress to suggest that the President’s son may have been to blame.
Hunter was also the subject of suspicion when cocaine was found at the White House last year. Given the hard-partying reputation of Congressional and White House staffers — and even, apparently, some members of Congress — the accusations against Hunter Biden are perhaps unfair. Political workers taking drugs — whatever next?
Join the discussion
Join like minded readers that support our journalism by becoming a paid subscriber
To join the discussion in the comments, become a paid subscriber.
Join like minded readers that support our journalism, read unlimited articles and enjoy other subscriber-only benefits.
SubscribeLol@those swivel-eyed left-wingers and their chants of freeze peach.
Free speech with purchase of speech of equal or greater value.
Maybe alien poop looks like cocaine?
It’s time the Vatican uncovered the so-called ‘secrets’ hidden away in its vault, such as the ‘revelations’ that were reputedly made at Fatima. What are they afraid of? That their authority would be undermined? Can’t think of any other reason for the secrecy.
The idea that extraterrestrial beings from a far more advanced civilisation would take the blindest bit of notice of a Papal attempt to ‘baptise’ them just shows how ludicrous the Vatican mentality is. Trying to pour water on an alien head would be the last act the Pope would do.
They will probably have been baptized already anyway, at their own local parishes
…you don’t really understand how adult baptism works, do you?
I’ve not immersed myself in that kind of nonsense.
Good pun. But I suggest you don’t wash your hands of it completely. It’s been around for 2,000 years.
This will be the first time the Vatican has held an official event discussing extraterrestrial affairs since 1978, and attendees are set to hear how the Catholic Church is planning for future supernatural encounters.
Extraterrestrial life is not inherently supernatural.
No, nor is there any reference to extraterrestrials in the press release. It’s about Marian apparitions. Stupid clickbait piece.
Supernatural just refers to anything beyond our understanding of the natural world.
The Vox article is remarkable in its high-mindedness and simultaneous lack of genuine principle. It’s just interest convergence theory. It admits that progressives have spent the last decade suppressing thought and then asks progressives to consider occasionally not suppressing opposing views when it might serve their interest.
“Free speech for me because I am right; no free speech for you because you are wrong.”
Various Catholic theorists over the years have considered the possibility of interaction with alien life forms, and how to bring the Good News to them, if they are encountered, and if they have not indeed already had a separate – perhaps tentacled – incarnation of Jesus upon their Earth. The Catholic Church is not nearly so behindhand in science as some may imagine – the Big Bang theory, for example, was largely invented by the priest Georges Lemaitre.
As for cocaine of unknown origin seemingly abandoned in the Capitol.. isn’t that news from about two months ago?
Cocaine of Unknown Origin is really when Blue Oyster Cult started to go downhill.
Abandoned in the Capitol would have been a great rock title, though.
I was actually a big fan, and I liked Fire and then there was Ninja Club and I was like, wat?
Biden will be forced to pardon Hunter or see his son in jail. Hunter will not spend much time in prison. Dad can pardon him since all the charges are federal. Can Biden delay the report to prison until after the election? At that point win or lose he will not have to face the electorate again. A pardon before the election will cost Biden votes. He is as guilty of bribery as his bagman Hunter. Will Hunter have a few months in jail waiting for his father to obtain lame duck status to pardon him?